The 12 Days of Excess

On the 12 days of excess,
Eating desserts gave to me............

12 extra pounds,
11 more because I lied,
10 extra inches,
9 month pregnant looking,
8 years to lose it,
7 places to liposuction,
6 extra folds,
5 flabby rings,
4 tummies to tuck,
3 extra chins,
2 B-cup moobs,
And I've fallen and I can't get up.