It would take a long time to explain how I feel about this, explaining how I got to this point, but to make it short, I do believe my life is being guided in some ways.
And sometimes specifically. For example, I wanted to become a Firefighter. Back when I started looking for a job as a Firefighter, it was difficult to get a job as one. Thousands would compete for Firefighter jobs. Depending on the City that was hiring, it could have meant 1 open position or 50 positions. I went everywhere there was a job announcement, from Santa Rosa to San Diego, and even Tuscon, Arizona. I passed most of the tests and even had interviews, but I didn't get hired by anyone except Los Angeles and Monterey Park.
When you want to be a Firefighter, you practice doing mock interviews with common questions given during interviews. Most questions are designed to test your honesty, integrity, and decision making skills. One common question has to do with witnessing a Firefighter possibly stealing something of value from a home that was on fire. You are supposed to answer that in two ways. First, you tell the interviewer that the Firefighter may not have the intent to steal these valuable items, but to collect them and to give them to the owners when he got outside. Second, you are to make sure that you report this incident to superiors to let them be aware of the situation, and that if there was any crime involved, you would not condone it.
I was asked this question with the City of San Diego, and I answered this question wrong and knew it. I tried to justify the answer instead of just saying I made a mistake, and I kept digging myself into a deeper and deeper hole. And I knew it. I was even given a chance to possibly fix this when they asked me if there was anything else I'd like to say. I didn't say anything. This totally blew my chance of being hired as a Firefighter for the City of San Diego.
So why did I blow it? I knew how to answer that question, yet, I didn't. I can only say that maybe it wasn't my destiny to work for the City of San Diego. When I got interviewed for the City of Los Angeles, I passed with flying colors. Yet there was a hiring freeze. I eventually did get hired by Los Angeles, and also got a call from Monterey Park.
So I can conclude that not only was I to become a Firefighter, but a Firefighter for the City of Los Angeles, not anywhere else. And it did feel "right." From training through probation, I did well, and was well liked. I was never given a bad evaluation.
Same with me becoming Paramedic trained. I wasn't taken in the first year I volunteered, but they did take me the next year when they had a new "On Duty" school schedule. I believe this schedule helped me pass Paramedic school, as the other way of "leaving" the Fire Dept for a short time and taking classes 5 days a week would have been a burden on my home life, and I would not have had time to study much.
Back then, the LAFD had a shortage of Paramedics which is why I volunteered to become one, and they were being overworked. When I became a Paramedic I was working on one of the busiest assignments in the City. Eventually I became weary of working as a Paramedic. I transferred to a "slower" spot, but it was still busy enough to keep wearing me down.
I decided I needed a break, and work at a "desk job" with regular 9-5 hours within the LAFD. So I looked for an administrative position at our training center. I found one, but it required certain certifications. I had to take and pass a 40 hour class. I did, paid for it on my own, and attended on my own time. Then I was asked to take one more class so that I could be certified in another section of the same unit. This time, the Fire Dept paid for the class, but I went on my own time.
When I was done, I was going to get transferred within a couple of weeks. Then another Firefighter got injured, and was placed in the position that I wanted. That's what we do with injured personnel, give them "desk jobs" until they heal. Then the budget cuts hit, and they streamlined that unit and when the injured Firefighter got better, they cut his position, and there were no more openings for me.
I did find another open position in another training unit, and I thought I was a shoe-in, as I knew both supervisors in charge of the unit. I ended up number 3 out of 3 with only 1 open position. It all worked out though, as budget cuts also cut the positions in that unit. I would have had to look for another position.
It wasn't meant to be, I was meant to stay out in the field as a Paramedic Firefighter. I even tried to transfer out of the Station I am currently at, to a "slower" Station. But that too did not happen. This is really not common, you can usually find administrative positions, or get another spot at another station. Is it Divine intervention or bad luck? I know what it is. The troubling part is, that I don't know why. Or maybe I do, and that's what troubles me.